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That was the familiar sound of the door slamming. Again.

"What am I supposed to DO?!?!"

 You’ve tried. Tried walking on eggshells around your explosive child. Tried the firm chinuch approach (consistency is key. Right?) Tried talking to the teacher… But it seems like nothing will ever stop the meltdowns.

Join me for a Free Masterclass on Meltdowns and get real information and practical tools on how to handle them.

Masterclass will be live on Tuesday March 5th (1:30 PM EDT, 8:30 PM IST)

Does your child come home from school... and totally lose it?

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Mine did. But his wasn’t “just a tantrum.”

His meltdowns were longer, harder and more draining than any of my other children. Daily. And I had no idea how to deal with it.

I tried the classic chinuch approach, being consistent, threatening consequences and blaming myself when it backfired (badly), only to finally learn that my sweet child was… complex. And the approaches I held onto like a lifeline were only aggravating the situation.

Eventually I realized that although my son looked like all the other kids on the playground, he was a thousand piece puzzle I was just beginning to put together! 

I’m a mom just like you, I was at the end of my rope and totally burnt out. 

Until I stumbled across a community of moms with kids just like mine. Moms who had tested and effective methods. Moms who made me feel like no, this wasn’t my fault, this was normal. 


I’ve since spent over a decade researching, experimenting and exploring the root of these over-the-top meltdowns that are so common in complex children. 

I call them children with Hidden Differences and I’m so excited to share all the information I wish I’d known back then with you! 

Who Are We

Here’s what you’ll learn in this info-packed Meltdown Masterclass.

Discover the 5 stages of every meltdown
And the specific language and behavior to use at each phase

Learn how to stay calm while your child is loosing it
Even if you feel like loosing it too

Understand how to support siblings of complex kids
So everyone in the family feels safe and seen


Who is this masterclass for?

This is for Frum Jewish women who are parents, grandparents or professionals of a child who:

  • has long intense and/or frequent melt-downs

  • has difficulty with impulse control

  • struggles with self-regulation

  • is in frequent conflict with siblings

Ready to learn what's really going on for your child?

Masterclass will be live on Tuesday March 5th  (1:30 PM EDT, 8:30 PM IST)

"You will find a wealth of wisdom, guidance and support in her approachable and compassionate teaching style"

-Rebbetzin Dina Scoonamaker, Speaker, Parent Educator,  and Mother of 7

About Ilyssa Bass, PhD

Hi, I'm Ilyssa Bass PhD, psychologist, parent educater and mommy of 5 awesome kids.

What qualifies me to run a masterclass on kids' meltdowns?

I'll give you one hint: It was'nt my years in achedimia.

I have lived through loooong, intense and frequent meltdowns that drained me to the core.

I was trained to diagnose and treat. I wanted a diagnosis, to find out what was wrong with my child and FIX IT. This mindset kept me stuck and helpless.

The gamechanger for me was finding other mommies like me, online communities of women who were raising kids with what I call Hidden Differences.

The support I found taught me how to uncover the roots of my child's stress, Support his strengths and create plans that transformed the difficult behavour so I could ENJOY my family.

Today my passion is sharing those techniques, creating that community for Jewish mommies of complex kids so none of us have to walk this journey alone.

Can't wait to meet you.

"Dr. Bass is a mom who understands what kind of child you have."

"One thing I took away that was an eye opener is that some kids really are more difficult. It was so validating to me since I see other moms and it looks like things are so much easier for them, and I wonder what I'm doing wrong. I know better now. I think this course will charge my perspective on how I parent. I'll be more patient (with myself too!) and also have a solid plan for behavior change, using the tools I learned. If you've been thinking about this course, I want to tell you that this is not only psychology. Dr. Bass is a mom who understands what kind of child you have. She also has a solid hashkafically sound program that is not antithetical to your values. That's the main reason I joined. Go for it! There is also lifetime access to the classes, so you can always refer back."

- Sara, US,  Mother of 4

  • I’m not sure if my child is complex. Maybe it’s just me?
    If you are a frum mommy with a behaviorally challenging child, you are in the right place. Here’s the deal: your child is stressed out. This stresses you out and you’ve had reactions you're not proud of. It’s ok. This is not your fault. I’m here to help you figure out a better way to parent your complex child.
  • What if my spouse and I are not on the same page?
    Welcome to the club! Most spouses do not start on the same page when it comes to complex kids. One usually stays stuck in the belief that more rewards, more consequences, and more consistency will create behavior change. The other one (usually the one who spends more time with the challenging child) thinks “there has to be another way”. The good news is, you don’t have to get your spouse on the same page right now. Find what works for you and your child; if it really works, your spouse will see it and then your job is to give it time and space.
  • What if my situation is slightly different from other parents?
    If you are a frum mommy with a behaviorally challenging child, you are in the right place. Everyone’s situation is slightly different; you may feel your lifestyle is more or less religious, you may be single-parenting, you may be differently-wired yourself. Don’t let your differences keep you from getting the support you need and deserve.
  • I am interested in joining the community, but I’m a super private person.
    We take confidentiality very seriously. We do not share our children’s pictures or even their first names, all video replays are hosted on a secure server visible only to group members and what is said in the group stays in the group. You can take as long as you need to warm up and participate. That said, we do turn our zoom videos on and use our real names to create a sense of community and trust.
  • What if my child has a diagnosis?
    Yup, these resources are for you.
  • What if my child doesn’t have a diagnosis?
    Yup, these courses and this community are for you too.
  • I’m a professional (therapist, educator, etc) or grandparent. Are your courses appropriate for me?
    Yes. I address parents but the underlying framework and theory are appropriate for professionals and grandparents as well.
  • What age children is this for? Is it suitable for adolescents?
    The courses and community focus primarily on children 2-12. If you are parenting an adolescent, you will find the classes very helpful. The process of identifying underlying stressors and supporting your child are even more important for adolescents. At present, most of the mothers in the group have children under age 12.
  • Are you taking on new clients?
    I’d love to help you! At the moment I am only available for short-term consultations and am not taking on long-term clients.
  • Should I take a class first or start with a consult?
    The classes offer a lot more “bang for your buck,” so I generally recommend starting with a class. If you feel you are too overwhelmed to sit through a class, a consult might be right for you, helping you get to a place where you have the clarity and direction to move forward.
  • How do I choose which class to take?
    Hidden Differences is a “crash course.’’ You can binge watch 2 hours worth of content (six 20-min video lectures). This course offers a ‘lay of the land’ on parenting a complex child. Deep Dive into Parenting Complex Kids is a good fit if you’re ready to dive into finding the root of your child’s stress and your stress; it will also help the process of finding a proactive plan that really works for everyone in the family.
  • What is the community? Is it a support group?
    Good question! The community offers a group coaching model. How is that different from a support group? While there is a lot of support in the community, we are also action focused and accountability oriented. We want to keep you on track and moving forward. We’ll help you identify problems and find solutions with the help of other mommies who really get it. The community meets three out of four Mondays a month; it includes lectures, guest speakers and a 24/6 online forum to brainstorm, support and collaborate with other mothers in the group.
  • How often does the group open?
    The group opens twice a year (early winter and early summer).
  • How do I join the community?
    In order to join the group you need to have taken Hidden Differences or Deep Dive into Parenting Complex kids. Why? This ensures that everyone in the group is working with the same core framework.

Dear Mom, these meltdowns are NOT your fault.

I know you just want to connect with your child, and the first step is understanding what is really going on here.


Your child may have hidden stressors tipping them over the edge, they may be differently wired, and they may also feel very out of control to the big feelings inside their small bodies.

My goal in this masterclass is to present you with clear, science-backed, mom-tested information that will finally give you an insight into what’s going on for your child—and how to effectively and lovingly deal with it.


I can’t wait to see you there.

Masterclass will be live on Tuesday March 5th (1:30 PM EDT, 8:30 PM IST)

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